So yes, I know that garbage is not necessarily a funny thing. But over the past few days I have noticed there are three types of people in my condominium complex when it comes to their trash.
I have lived here for about 5 months and this is my first condo/rental. We are responsible for taking our trash to the compactor since there is no pickup at our units.
Let me introduce you to the three types of garbage people living in my complex...
1. The PUT IT IN YOUR TRUNK AND LET IT STINK person
This person will take that bag of trash and dash as fast as then can towards their vehicle holding the bag as far away from their nose as possible. Once near the trunk they pop it open quickly and chuck it in. Now a good thing to do would be to drive immediately up to the trash compactor and dump it. But noooooooo (and I have been known to do this) some of us will forget it is there until we come back to the car and the entire way to the compactor we have this awful look upon our faces. That look of sucking on a lemon and smelling an onion at the same time.
2. The HANG IT OUT YOUR CAR WINDOW person
This was entirely new to me and I thought it was simple and genius. You take the stinky bag of trash and put your arm out of your rolled down driver's window. You then hold the bag outside of your car and drive down the street. This is a GREAT idea...except when you are me and you give it a try. I am a smart person, honest I am. But everyone has their moments of forgetfulness. The trash compactor is located at the front of our complex outside of the gates so I usually drop off the garbage on the way to work. Well I had my bag of stinky garbage hanging out of the window and as you may have guessed I drove right past the compactor and onto the main road. I realized it right before I made it to the busy road. I did a u-turn and headed back. I laughed the entire way. I can't believe I did that.
3. The PUT IT ON YOUR TRUNK AND PRAY IT DOESN'T FALL person
This is the newest one I have recently seen in the past few days as I have walked the dog. Works great for those cars with spoilers on the trunks. This person strategically places the trash bags on their trunk wedging them onto the spoiler. They drive towards the compactor at snails pace crossing their fingers the bag doesn't fall and bust open. I haven't seen any broken bags so this method seems to work. Now imagine if I did that and forgot to stop at the compactor. Not a pretty picture.
I get stuck between person 1 and 2. Can't be person 3 since I drive an SUV. It does provide a good laugh when I am walking the dog.
What kind of a trash person would you be?
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6 comments:
I would be the keep driving by the trash compactor and forgetting to put the garbage in.
I am going to try to be better about it from now on. lol
Funny story. I hold mine far from me. I don't run, but have a fear the bag may bust before I get to my outdoor cans!
hmmmm i know i a lreadt take it out with sninky face lemon look :)
We usually do the third one, b ut we do have a spoiler.
Once, we took over a janitorial job for a friend while they were on vacation for a week and we did this. Only the bag flew off the car and rolled, spilling it's contents everywhere.
Since it was at a factory of immigrant workers that threw dirty toilet paper in the garbage instead of flushing it, you can imagine the stretch of mess we had to clean up.
Ohhhhh soooo gross lovables. I think I would hire someone to clean it up.
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